Flipping through channels this afternoon, I heard somebody talking about "Are you addicted to Praise?" but I didn't tune into it, even though I immediately thought "that is so me."
I was thinking - is that why I blog? Is that why I always feel the need to be validated? Is that why I've always needed a wide variety of friends to help and support me? Is that jerk who thinks I'm just an attention-getter right? I had myself all worked up about it, seriously. I think my anxiety meds were wearing off early or something!
But then tonight I decided to search for it on Yahoo and found out it was on Oprah which explains why I didn't watch it. I like Oprah ok, but I was on my way to watch Ellen which I adore. Oprah can't compete with that. Anyhow, Oprah.com had a quiz to take to determine whether or not I was, in fact, addicted to praise. They also had an article about the three signs:
1. Infinite Praise Tolerance
I like validation as much as anybody, but I have my limit. If somebody IRL gushes about something I've done, I become very uncomfortable and start to feel that they are being lesss than geniune. For you online folks, though, keep piling it on. I'm good with that! *wink*
2. Flattering sidekick
Oh, that's funny. If my BFF or my daughter or even my husband compliments me, I know that it is genuine. Flattery is not part of he personality of the people closest to me. Kiddo will say "You're making progress, Mom, but you're still really fat." I think she gets that from her Auntie Mandy.
3. Extreme Praise Avoidance
I can take a compliment (I can! Try me!). I will avoid public display because of my anxiety but I have actually been complimented on my ability to take a compliment. One day in the buffet line at church (that's right, you wanna make something of it?) My friend Tiffany said "Melanie! You look GREAT!" and my response was "Thanks! I FEEL great!" and after we sat down to eat, two people I didn't know came and told me that not only had they noticed that I'd been losing weight, but they were really impressed about how I handled taking a compliment.
If you're interested, you can take Martha Beck's quiz here.
Oh, and if you're curious about my results, here's what it said:
Congratulations, you’re normal! Sure, praise feels good to you, but you aren't obsessed with it to the point of dysfunction. You're more interested in what you're doing than in how you look doing it; you give to others because you're thinking about them, not about how you look to them. Normal is good.
Well, maybe I can say that I'm normal in this one paticular way, at least.