because there is no way in HELL that I gained 4.5 lb overnight.
and there is no way in HELL my husband just brought me this shelf and told me to get it out of the way of "his stuff" in the guest bedroom
and there is no way in HELL he gave me grief all last night about not cleaning up his MESS (which he would punish me severely for if I even moved it an inch)
There is no way in hell this is my life. Maybe if I go back to bed and wake up again later, it will be better.